My boyfriend runs his own antique shop and I thought I’d share with you some of the things customers say whilst in the shop…….
Man pops his head through the door: “Hi, I don’t suppose you have any carpet tiles?”.
John looks around the shop, wondering when his antique shop began to resemble a carpet shop. “Only the ones glued to the floor. Sorry!” he replies.
Customer: “Is that (bright red, obviously brand new and installed by law) fire extinguisher for sale?”
Customer: “I’m after a mobile phone.”
John: “An old one?”
Customer: “No, a brand new one.”
John: “Sorry, we only sell antique mobile phones!”
Customer: “It’s good to see a second-hand junk shop back in the town again.”
“It’s a bloody antique shop” John mutters under his breath.
Customer: “So you don’t buy new stuff then?”
Customer: “Would you like to take a look at my dresser? I’d like to sell it.”
The customer proceeds to show John a photo of an Ikea dresser.
John: “It looks a bit new…”
Customer: “Of course it is. I only bought it last year.”
Customer: “What guarrantee could you give me on this clock?”
John: “I can guarrantee you it’s a clock…”
Customer: “Do you buy stuff?
John: “Only if it’s suitable for the shop.”
Customer: “Why does it have to be suitable for the shop?”
I’m sure there’s more to come!